Emotions Runneth Over
My emotions are all over the place! For so many reasons....and in this time...while I get my heart & mind right. I choose to be silent! I can't post uplifting things, when I know my heart isn't right. So, I am getting it together. GOD has me on lock!
He puts the right words in front of my eyes, for me to see at the right moments! He allows me to hear the right words, as well! It's coming....it just takes me a lil minute sometimes!
These last few weeks have been sorta rough! For so many different reasons!
I have been so giving of myself in so many ways to help enhance others' lives and it's been exhausting. My friends don't get it...heck I don't get it sometimes...why did GOD make me so loving and caring for others!?! LOL I mean, sometimes I wished I didn't care so much b/c when you do - you leave yourself open for all sorts of things....but Coasta has a BIG heart & will always have a BIG heart!
I am also, disappointed in several individuals for various reasons! Me gotta get my heart right & FORGIVE...it's all a learning experience - for sure!
Meanwhile, Thanksgiving this year was quite different. Thanksgiving day, I went out with a friend and had a great evening! My first Thanksgiving dining in a restaurant. I felt bad for the staff though...having to work on Thanksgiving BUT grateful for them....AND they were all so very friendly and loving - which made it a really nice dining experience & Thanksgiving! :-)
Then the next day, I went to my hometown Charleston...to spend the rest of my Holiday with my family....BUT it was just not the same. This year, I got really saddened. I really miss the ole day's when everyone was alive and together. I started reminiscing about my Great Grandma, my Great Great Grandma, my Grand Aunt, my Uncle, my Grandpa and my brother.....whew....they are all deceased and it just bothered me this year....that things were very different! So, next year...I'm thinking we will have to do something different as a family...b/c that was depressing this year!
Plus, as I go through my lil moments here....I really wish my Grandpa was still around...for me to talk to...I miss seeing him smile and hearing him say my name - as he said it...Coassie! Missing my loved ones...but I know they are in a better place.
I am literally exhausted: Mentally, Physically & Emotionally! All for so many reasons and if you have been in my world....you would surely understand the exhaustion!
I know there is a Master Plan for all of this one day....BUT right now...I am a lil frustrated with the process!! Then I read this!