Happy Father's Day...or not!?
A day that should be a day for Men to celebrate being a Father... is not so pleasing for those whose Father's abused them (physically, sexually, mentally) or were deadbeats (abandoned them or was there but wasn't there). In the aspect of was there but wasn't, they know of their father. He existed. They know who he was...but he never visited or called them. He never taught them anything. He never did things with them. Never read them a book. He never took them anywhere. They don't have these great stories about their dad, etc. Dad said, he was coming but never showed up. He never said or showed love. Never hugged them, etc. They are many reasons why people have so much anger in their hearts on this day but many are because of the deadbeat dads.
I experienced hearing some of that heartbreaking situations today while in Children's Church and you know ... you just want to LOVE on the kids even more!! So, they know they are not forgotten and they are LOVED. If you have ever felt any pain like what I mentioned above, then you can relate with the kids and that feeling. Heart breaking. I know how they felt. Many adults still carry the pain of their youth with them; they have yet to let it go. Single Moms have to deal with questions: Why isn't my dad around?
My dad: I lived with my dad at times in my youth for various reasons. So, you would think I would have a good relationship with him. One would think... but that's not the case. I don't hate him. I just don't have a strong relationship with him. He doesn't communicate well. There are many reasons why he is the way he is... and well I realized over the years. My teenaged dad, was probably not mature enough for the responsibilities of being a parent. So, he made a lot of unwise decisions. Whatever the reasons. I had to forgive him, love him and accept him for who he is and I have.
BUT Thank God for Grandparents! My Grandfather and I had a really good relationship and he was always loving and caring! I could talk to my Grandpa about just about anything. He was a family man. He was a Provider, a Protector, a Loving man, a Man of God. I looked forward to visiting with my Grandpa. My Grandpa was truly a GOOD Man & Father and what he demonstrated to me... was family wasn't always blood.... because you see he wasn't my biological Grandpa... but if you didn't know that personally. You would never known that; by his actions towards us. Such a pure and loving heart he had and the only Grandpa I ever known. My Grandpa, knowing the issues I had with my parents always told me to forgive and love them anyway... so I did.
My son's father doesn't do what he should but I always kept the door open for him to have a relationship with his child; because it's important to kids. I didn't want my kid not knowing, who his father was and that side of his family. Doing so can leave a void in their heart; didn't want that for my child. So, I forgave him for his actions and kept the door open for him and his family to know my son.
Coming from my background with my parents. I always told myself I am not going to be like them. In some ways, I have failed but GOD is a restorer and there is still hope for tomorrow. I have FAITH that I will be blessed with a Man after God's heart some day soon; to take me as his wife that will love me and my child as his own. I have FAITH in my Heavenly Father and I know that He will supply all of my needs.
This Holiday to me seems like it wasn't as promoted like "Mother's Day" ... which saddens my heart in another way because they are really a lot of GREAT MEN who are WONDERFUL Father's to their children, etc. Who are PROVIDERS and PROTECTORS for their children and their households. I feel that we need to make sure we SHOW those men love and appreciation for being responsible! Need not to forget about them.
So, whatever your situation is... I pray you find it in your heart to FORGIVE. No one is perfect. We mess up, don't get it right or just need help...but there is still hope that things can turn around for the better. If you have faith, to believe it can. If nothing at all just forgive them for their wrongdoings. So, you can heal from it all and be free.
AND do know that as a Believer of Christ; you have a Heavenly Father who loves YOU and will never abandon you or hurt you and will supply all of your needs!